Mr. Skin is a Thriving Website; Mrs. Skin is a Barely-There Wordpress Blog. What’s Up With That?

Last week, I asked the same question that someone else posed two years ago on yahoo answers. “Is there a female version of Mr. Skin?”

If you don’t know, Mr. Skin (the original and male-audience-focused supersite) is the self-acclaimed “world’s foremost authority on celebrity nudity.” The site’s main purpose is to let you know at exactly what moment female celebrities are nude in movies and television shows. Helping men fast-forwarding to the good parts is their forte. The website was made even more famous after being referenced in the blockbuster comedy “Knocked Up.”

Witness the female’s answer: Mrs. Skin: A Celebration of the Female Gaze. This wordpress blog has existed since April 2008 (but not updated since September 2009) and features about 35 photos of some male celebrities, most shirtless, others just partially suggestive. (No offense intended to the blog owner, but there aren’t many). It’s the only near-equivalent to Mr. Skin that I could find.

It makes me wonder: why is it that Mr. Skin is a thriving website and Mrs. Skin is a barely-there wordpress blog?

Is it that women are unmotivated and incapable of creating such a resource? Uh, no!

Is it that there aren’t enough examples of male celebrities showing their goodies in film? Possibly. I can only think of a handful. Even Mrs. Skin couldn’t find many photos.

Perhaps it’s reasonable to assume that a female version of Mr. Skin that focuses only on providing the moments a man provides a full frontal or an ass shot would not be lucrative enough for a primarily female audience.

My guess is it’s because women aren’t as motivated as men are by full frontals. The popularity of daytime soap operas (which have significant limits on what they can show and allude to) suggest that it isn’t just about the skin for women. Get our minds involved to get the juices flowing!

Well maybe such a resource does exist and I can’t seem to find it. (After all, a “Mrs. Skin” reference may be copyright infringement…)

If someone does create a female-oriented Mr. Skin equivalent, let me know. And how about a shout out to V Moore!

British “Bad Sex in Fiction Award” highlights the most awkward description of an intimate encounter

For more than 15 years, the Literary Review magazine’s bad sex in fiction award has pointed out the best of the worst sex descriptions in literary royalty. The award is given to “the passage considered to be the most redundant in an otherwise excellent novel” in an attempt to discourage authors from writing poorly featured sexcapades.
Here’s the latest winning passage and an explanation as to why it received the award. Read all about it here.

"This was not soft porn. This was no longer two unclothed women caressing and kissing on a bed. There was something primitive about it now, this woman-on-woman violence, as though in the room filled with shadows, Pegeen were a magical composite of shaman, acrobat, and animal. It was as if she were wearing a mask on her genitals, a weird totem mask, that made her into what she was not and was not supposed to be," writes Roth. "There was something dangerous about it. His heart thumped with excitement – the god Pan looking on from a distance with his spying, lascivious gaze."

'Roth is very anxious about his description of sex," said Jonathan Beckman at the Literary Review of the extract. "Why write of a scene that repeatedly features a green dildo, 'this was not soft porn', unless you're worried that it might be taken as such - in this case, with sentences like 'then she crouched above Tracy, brushing Tracy's lips and nipples with her mouth and fondling her breasts...', the worry seems justified. But it's the overcompensation that qualifies this passage for the award – the totems and shamans are an attempt to convince us that Roth's leering is actually giving some vital anthropological insight."

Famed author Norman Mailer won the award in 2007 for this line: His mouth lathered with her sap, he turned around and embraced her face with all the passion of his own lips and face, ready at last to grind into her with the Hound, drive it into her piety
Read more

Mailer’s response: "Some authors spend five pages describing a walk in the park but when it comes to sex they'll just do two sentences - 'she rolled off him'. Sex is exciting stuff - it can be vey dirty and smelly, but you've just got to get stuck in, and I'm not afraid of doing that."

I’m sure the Literary Review would melt down if they searched for “often perfunctory use of redundant passages of sexual description” in specified erotica.

Orgasm for Peace: December 21

Want to help promote peace, reduce global levels of violence, hatred and fear? Have an orgasm. More specifically, have an orgasm on December 21st.

According to a group of “scientists, engineers and artists” that coordinate the Global Consciousness Project, you too can bring peace to the earth by participating in the Global Orgasm for Peace. According to the group’s website, “by concentrating our thoughts before, during and after orgasm on peace and loving-kindness, the synergy of high orgasmic physical energy combined with the power of positive visualization could help reduce global levels of violence, hatred and fear.”

Apparently, the group can measure the uh-uh-outcomes and last year the correlations were subtle. They’re hoping for a much more satisfying climax this time around. Read about the so-called science.

This effort reminds me of a Politics Daily blog entry I read recently called “Saving the World One Pair of Panties at a Time.” It talked about T-shirts and “message panties” that bear pro-peace phrases such as “Stop Genocide” and promise profits to charity. “Fashion statements that promise political action with no more effort than getting dressed in the morning?”

At least with the global orgasm doesn’t require you to even get dressed.

Do I believe the answer to global violence is a miniscule raise in positive energy? Absolutely not. Do I believe it’s worth knocking boots the 21st? Ain’t nothing wrong with that.

Violet Blue Defines Erotica, Oprah November 2009

Oprah forged some new territory by providing an episode dedicated completely to women's take on porn and erotica. Lisa Ling went behind the scenes at a porn filming, Jenna Jameson appeared...View a couple of clips and a transcript online at Oprah.com

One of my fav editors, Violet Blue, appeared b/c she has written "The Smart Girl's Guide to Porn." Here's her take on the difference between porn and erotica:

"Porn is something that is a graphic sexual image that conjures up an animalistic reaction in you. You like it or you don't," she says. "Erotica also is graphic sexual imagery, but it has an extra component or several extra components that resonate with the viewer—be it artistic, be it passionate, be it something that emotionally engages you, be it something that parlays into a fantasy that you have about sexuality or the way that you relate to the people on screen."

Vampires Equal Sex

After months and months of defiance, my friend has finally convinced me to read the Twilight series, if only to provide her someone to talk about it with. I’m pushing it to the weekend.

However, it’s worth exploring our society’s most recent (and yet historical) obsession, mostly because vampires equal sex.

Why do we find vampires sexy? Read msnbc.com’s take on the topic.

Don’t feel like theorizing? Then just watch the sexiness. The Daily Beast put together a media gallery of the 16 sexiest vampires. Video clips and all. May I recommend the sex on the ceiling in number 10?

Great news!

exciting news! Just heard from Rachel Kramer Bussel that she plans to include one of my stories in her next print anthology, which will be published by Cleis Press. Cleis Press is the most reputable publisher in the field. Cleis has final say, so I'll know in March, but this is a very, good start!!

On Hiatus

I'm going on blog hiatus. Will be working on some new pieces, but disappearing from the blogosphere for awhile. Cheers!

Does Lack of Condom Use in Porn Encourage Unprotected Sex?

In July, an AIDS advocacy group filed complaints against 16 production companies that show unprotected sex in porn movies stating they would not stop until there is a policy of requiring condoms to be used in porn.

I found this statement from the foundation’s rep to be unnecessarily harsh: "Our elected officials and our government are treating the young people who are performing in these films as trash that don't deserve protection.”

To protect actors and actresses from disease, regulations already exist that require routine health and STD testing of all production company porn players.

Most porn fans that I know greatly dislike seeing condoms in their. I guess the question is: how much influence does pornography have on real-life sex practices of its viewers. A question with a complicated answer I would imagine.

Take this into consideration. In a 1996 Journal of Psychology and Human Sexuality study, 168 male and 149 female undergraduates enrolled in a psychology course were asked to read one of the following types of stories: erotic with condom placement described, erotic without condom use, or non-erotic with a model for discussing condoms. The men and women who read the non-erotic stories were most positive about condoms and reported the strongest intentions to use condoms in the future. These findings suggest that erotica is not necessary to produce positive attitudes toward condoms.

I wonder if studies with porn would produce similar results…

Spread Sex Virally. Safe Sex, That Is…

Apparently, Boston teens need to have protected sex and the public health system is using Facebook, YouTube and MTV to tell them that.

There has been a 70 percent increase in Chlamydia cases in Boston since 1999. Understanding that adolescents would rather hear from their peers than be told by some old woman about safe sex (sorry Sue Johanson), the Boston Public Health Commission held the “Get Reel: Check Yourself” contest. The winning PSA features teenagers in a classroom learning about condoms and other safe sex practices from a teen instructor. Teens can also interact on a Facebook page and ask questions anonymously.

On a side note: I was talking to a nurse a couple of months ago about weird baby names and she said that when she worked in labor and delivery, one of the mothers wanted to name her daughter Chlamydia because it sounded pretty. They strongly encouraged her to reconsider.

The Winning PSA

Women are Born to Steal Men? New Research Suggests that Woman are Subconsciously Drawn to Other Attached Men

New research out from the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology suggests that single seek attached men. The study shows that single women were significantly more interested in the male when he was attached. The researchers suggest that it may be because an attached man has demonstrated his ability to commit and in some ways his qualities have already been pre-screened by another woman.

You can add your comments to this story on a NY Times blog page.

How the Study was Done:
To investigate, the researchers quizzed male and female undergraduates — some involved in romantic relationships, some unattached — about their ideal romantic partner.
Next, each of the experimental subjects was told that he or she had been matched by a computer with a like-minded partner, and each was shown a photo of an attractive person of the opposite sex. (All the women saw the same photo, as did all the men.) Half of the subjects were told that their match was already romantically involved with someone else, while the other half were told that their match was unattached. Then the subjects were all asked how interested they were in their match.
To the men in the experiment, and to the women who were already in relationships, it didn’t make a significant difference whether their match was single or attached. But single women showed a distinct preference for mate poaching. When the man was described as unattached, 59 percent of the single women were interested in pursuing him. When that same man was described as being in a committed relationship, 90 percent were interested.

My Latest Piece: This Week's Fiction Cover Story at CleanSheets.com

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Eight Words and Phrases to Avoid in LGBT Communications

Check out this post to the “Out Front Blog,” a blog dedicated to stimulating discussion on gay and lesbian communication issues. Bryan Blaise suggests eight words and phrases that marketers and communicators should avoid using and why.

Read the whole post

• Lifestyle or “the gay lifestyle”
• Sexual preference or preference
• Choice, choose or “choose to be gay”
• Homosexual
• Alternative
• Tolerance
• Special rights
• Friend